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Screw The Embargo! “Avatar” Review! (”It’s A Dud”)
…is a DUD! That’s right. A major disappointment of epic proportions. Now keep in mind that no doubt this is going to be a true minority opinion since I’m sure every review (with the exception of me, Armond White I’ll bet and few other film critic friends of mine) will be slitting their throats and jumping off a cliff to in order to rave about how unique, extraordinary and revolutionary this film is. Most of that will be because James Cameron made the film who for some reason people believe can cure cancer with the touch of his hand and make the dead live again. If Michael Bay or McG had made the same exact film would people be raving about it? But let’s be rational here. First of all about 75% of the film is just basically a CGI computer animated movie. Admittedly a very realistic, detailed one at that, but still just a cartoon with occasionally a live actor in it especially during the final battle sequence. Cameron also employs a new advanced “motion capture” technique like that one Robert Zemeckis uses for his films like A Christmas Carol and Beowulf, except the detail is better and there isn’t that creepy weird “dead eyes” effect you get in Zemeckis’ animated films. As for that supposedly new 3D process, making YOU part of the movie, that was going to shape the shape of 3D movies to come….nope. It’s the same. Yes it’s quite good, very sharp but it’s nothing new. It’s pretty much the same as in Beowulf and that I thought was that 3D state of the art then. So now we get to the story and here is where the big problems begin for me. Basically this big corporation wants to mine this planet Pandora populated by these giant, blue skinned, half animal/ half black (I’ll get to that in a minute) aliens, called the Na’vi, for this mineral we need back on earth to survive since we’ve environmentally wrecked this planet. Sam Worthington (that square head guy from Terminator Salvation, which I should add I surprisingly really liked by the way just to let you know I’m not all Mr. Grumpy all the time) plays a wheelchair bound Marine who volunteers for an experiment in which his mind in transposed into the mind of an artificially created Na’vi (of course making him able to run, jump and fight) and put on the planet to to infiltrate the Na’vi and find a way that the corporation can get the mineral though peaceful diplomatic means. If he fails then the Marines are coming in laying everything to waste. In due time he falls in love with Neytiri (Zoe Saldana) and learns to way of the Na’vi and realize they’re got a good thing going here. Of course everything comes down the big battle between the Na’vi and the Marines in an epic battle to save their planet. Guess who wins??? But the story is trite, way too long at 165 minutes and at times approaches a fifth grade level mentality. And some of the dialogue is just groan worthy especially Sigourney Weaver’s “Ranger Rick” line which got huge unintentional laughs from the audience I saw it with. Cameron has said that it took him 12 years to write this script which is amazing considering that a huge chunk of it is nothing but retread of his film Aliens (still along with Terminator 2 are my favorite Cameron movies) Avatar has the same hardcore lust for Marines and military discipline and hardware and with them battling aliens, those same giant robots people sit in and operate just like the one Weaver used to fight the bad mutha’ queen alien in Aliens, the same slimy corporate bad guy like in Aliens and even the same tough, butch, female Hispanic Marine like in Aliens except that this time in Avatar the part is played by a real Hispanic actress (Michelle Rodriguez) But the film biggest sin that that it’s BORING! Slight and one dimensional characterization and an overextended trite story means that I literally had to keep from falling asleep for half the of the film. And of course let’s get to those Na’vi. Once again we have a sci-fi film with aliens who are basically an African tribe with black features who speak in a pseudo African language, wearing their hair in dreads or African twist braids and tribal clothing and performing quasi African rituals. And to reinforce that notion most of the roles are played by black actors like Saldana, CCH Pounder, Laz Alonzo. Well maybe the good thing is that they’re not those Nigerian cannibals like in District 9 but they’re still noble savages. Come to think of it, with the exception of one black sargent early in the film, I don’t recall any other black actors or actresses in the film. Reminds me of what Richard Pryor said many years ago about that 1975 sci-fi film Logan’s Run, which is set in the 23rd century, that it was the scariest film he ever saw because there were no black people in it. As he said: “they’re not planning for us to around then”. That came me the willies too when I saw it. And I guess we’re not going to be around in Avatar either except as the Na’vi. What is this infatuation with us as noble savages in sci-fi films? Is it a way to imagine us as culturally, intellectually and technogically inferior as other races move on? You tell me. I’ve said enough. 24 comments to Screw The Embargo! “Avatar” Review! (”It’s A Dud”) |
  
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So yes I’ve seen Avatar, the film that will change cinema forever as we know it. Yeah….right. I couldn’t post anything about it because Fox had set an embargo on any reviews for the film. Now usually studios do that for literally every movie and people break them all the time. But Fox had this special punishable by death embargo, so to play it safe (not for me you understand of course but for Shadow And Act) I played nice. Well, that went out the window and people started posting reviews everywhere online and in the London newspapers and today the Chicago Sun Times published Roger Ebert’s four star review, promoting it on the front page, almost a full week before the film comes out. So therefore I think I’m free to say what I think about the film and what I’ve got to say is that the film…
It’s a movie. Get over it.
Pryer is a comedian. He said that in jest. You however seem to be genuinely afraid of genocide…
I have yet to see the film, but just from watching the trailer I know that many of the marines are African American.
You got it all wrong. Even though the Navi are played by mostly black actors, they have the most important role in the film. So this race card that you point out is irrelevant. Does it even matter? we live in a post MLK world. So the answer is no it does not matter. And you do have to understand that this movie has to play to an audience of all ages, no kid is gonna want to watch a movie that has ONLY adult dialog and be “serious”. The film is suppose to teach a vital lesson in life “dont judge a book by its cover”, take us on an adventure to a new planet, and bring out the kid inside of us. Which it delivers on very well..hmm maybe you missed all of that because you were falling asleep, maybe you should have gotten better sleep the night before hand.
“First of all about 75% of the film is just basically a CGI computer animated movie. Admittedly a very realistic, detailed one at that, but still just a cartoon with occasionally a live actor in it especially during the final battle sequence.”
OMG, ANIMATION!!!
Get over yourself.
From the trailer I was not impressed with this film. Some months back when the hype was ratcheted up about this being game-changing filmmaking, I said, I really hope Cameron comes through on this one. Because the worst thing ever in filmmaking is to have an inflated budget over-hyped movie that falls short.
I really like James Cameron’s work. I’ve dug (just about) all his past films, so I will reserve final judgment until I see it. But why do I feel this will becoming District 9 two with these new posters crawling out of the woodwork to flood S & A with their fanboy-itis?
The trailers didn’t show me anything that would “change the future of movies” and apparently the plot won’t, either. Thanks for the review — sounds like it’s worth adding the Netflix queue, but not putting forth much effort beyond that.
Geez, what’s the deal w/ these fanboys?
I’m not really that pulled into the story via the plot or trailer, nor am I seeing the big deal about the 3D animation. The crisis of Black representation in Sci-fi narratives is too great for me to expect Cameron to really take on, so that pretty much comes with the territory. The only thing that could really get me to pay attention is Ms. Weaver’s performance, looks like i’ll be waiting for this one at the redbox kiosk…
Yet another conspiracy in a big budget Hollywood flick for Sergio! Yep, its all about downing black folk! The PC police are out early on this one! No black power fist was pumped so its all a racist mess! someone get Serg a tissue. He’s crying AGAIN.
With all due respect, Sergio, you don’t like science fiction. So I’m laughing at the very idea of you sitting down in a room knowing that this is what was going to be on the screen.
Why would you even SEE this film? I mean, really. You hated District 9. You hated Star Trek. You haven’t even MENTIONED “Moon” or any other small budget science fiction film. And now you say you enjoyed “Terminator Salvation”. I rest my case. You hate science fiction.
Yet, you went to see this film. Now, because you hate the very foundation of this story, while the rest of us saw “wow, that’s a neat idea!” You saw:”a sci-fi film with aliens who are basically an African tribe with black features who speak in a pseudo African language, wearing their hair in dreads or African twist braids and tribal clothing and performing quasi African rituals”
man, WHAT? Since when are wide spaced eyes, claws, freckles on blue skin and straight hair “black features”?
There was nothing this movie could do that could make you like it, because for 165 minutes, you had that Star Trek: TNG episode with the Black people who kidnap Tasha Yar in your head.
So you left the movie and thought:
“What is this infatuation with us as noble savages in sci-fi films?”
Yes, because clearly Zoe Saldana is playing a noble savage in Star Trek.
I had a discussion once about “Planet Of the Apes”. A truly horrible remake with Mark Wahlberg. Some critics problem with the film was that “the Apes were Black”. Meanwhile they were played by white people and HELLO, they were talking apes. IMAGINARY. Same here. The film goes OUT of its WAY to not be on Earth, and you see Earth.
Nobody’s looking for James Cameron for commentary on African-American issues. That’s up to US.
Darryl
As I said at the beginning of my review that it was only one person’s opinion of the film. It is not the end all be all, definitive, final word about it and nor should it be. The film hasn’t even opened yet or has been seen by the public. You more than free to post your own review on this site once you’ve seen it. It never ceases to amaze when I say some negative words about a film some people act like as if I’ve struck a knife through their heart or insulted them and their entire family. When I posted my rave review of the Prncess and the Frog recently no said said a peep in disagreement though they are perfectly free to do so. My film critic friends and I always disagree about films almost every day (most recently just yesterday about Guy Richie’s Sherlock Holmes with Robert Downey on which we were split right down the middle) We never get upset or take out our disagreements personally. In fact we love it. We have our separate opinions and then move on to the next film.
Also the idea that I hate sci-fi and why would I bother to see the film then is ridiculous. I love films and I see everything from rom-coms, to horror, to comedies to sci-fi, to action films to dramas. Just because I wasn’t crazy about the sci-fi films you like then all of sudden I hate all sci-fi films. You may hate Inglorious Basterds but that wouldn’t mean to me the you hate war movies. You didn’t like like that one. But now I’m supposed to see only certain films now?
Do you even realize every single Na\’vi in Avatar is an actual performance, down to every single body movement? It’s not simply “animated” Sergio.
I suggest you take a look here, at about 1:50
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zjLfE-yjpPg
This is obviously personal, it is clear you had a vested interest in writing this movie negatively.
But oh well, now Avatar is doomed. An unknown blogger with an axe to grind disliked the film..
Now I am positive the film will flop, after all Sergio from SHADOWANDACT said it’s a dud! He’s also good friends with ARNOLD WHITE, who along with him and a few other “friends” are the only ones in the world ENLIGHTENED enough to hate this film.
Blah blah blah! Let’s be careful about the grammar and sentence structure a little bit on this forum. The illustrious thinking of those of you who comment gets mangled in the translation. Jarring errors stop the reader in their tracks while they waste mental effort trying to untangle what you meant to say. Yeah, that’s right, I’m critiquing the whole damn site ya’ll. What? Who the fuck am I? Létat c’est moi!
Now, carry on people!
Sergio hated Star Trek? I’ll give you all the rest, but the new Trek is non-negotiable. Trek was great! When I saw the full trailer for Avatar, I knew what I will be expecting once I see it. It took the dances with wolves sort of thing and put it in space. Also, the writing feels very much like Independence day.
I know that this movie is supposed to wow me visually, but I bet that once I see Avatar, the story and the characters will be forgettable. As for box office, I expect it to be a big winner.
Fixed:
“Once again we have a sci-fi film with aliens who are basically a *Native American* tribe with *Native American* features who speak in a pseudo *Native American* language, wearing their hair in dreads or *Native American* twist braids and tribal clothing and performing quasi *Native American* rituals. ”
The Navi (Navajo?) are obviously a stand-in for Native Americans, or possibly Afghan/Iraqi Muslims, given our current foreign entanglements. The Iraqis even have oil too, a mineral of vital national interest just like the Navi!
Isn’t it so nice that someone can masquerade as Roger Ebert just so that they can attack the writer? I just love the internet.
Don’t be so sure, VichusSmith. This seems like the crazy rantings of someone who would give “thumbs-up” to the Garfield movies. Still going to see Avatar anyway.
@sergio
What did you think of Sherlock Holmes?
I like it!
I’m still seeing Avatar regardless of what the criticism is. It’s be so uber-hyped that I Have to catch it. So I don’t I have to see this in 3d?
Noble Africans and noble Native Americans in movies/popular media are virtually interchangeable and I guess which one you decide they are depends on your world perspective.
That out of the way, I love sci-fi/specualtive ficktion movies, it’s actually my favorite genre (it’s the only DVD’s I have that outnumber my Black flix) but I dunno, especially after watching the 60 Minutes intv and footage, I’m not really into Avatar anymore. No I haven’t seen it, but everything that Sergio said is what I gleaned from the trailer and early footage anyway. And Cameron’s movies never have good dialogue anyway, but usually has great memorable lines. I personally don’t have a problem with the metaphorical Africans/Native Americans, and I NEVER have a problem with seeing Michelle Rodriguez on the silver screen, but I still don’t know if I’d pay to see Avatar. Still, I hope it’s better than Sergio thought it was.
Glad to hear Sherlock Holmes meets your standards though Sergio…I’m craving to see that.
P.S. I love that ‘Roger Ebert’ is familiar with ARNOLD WHITE…LMAO
@Sergio
I want to see Sherlock Holmes but I hate bad accents, they are so distracting so I’m curious to see if RDJ pulled off the british accent. British actors usually do good american accent but american actors don’t usually pull off the british accent.
Someone on this site should write a blog commenting on that racist clap trap put out recently by the Phoenix News. It is in print and on their website. I will write my take on it, but I have no access to do so here. You can read the Phoenix news and their mind numbing benighted bullshit here at http://www.phoenixnewtimes.com
There you will find an article about Barack Obama entitled “The Pink Negro” wherein he is attacked by the racist forces of Arizona. Arizona where dwells the likes of Sheriff Joe Arpaio and his Mexican round up spectacles. You don’t wanna miss this shit!
If you write something about it, let me know.
why oh why didn’t i listen and also trust my gut. That movie was worse than bad. Just utterly dumb and positively predictable. If you do go watch it, take your Ipod and listen to something other than the rubbish dialogue.
I agree that it was predictable and in a way this story has been told before. But it was a solid, solid feature. I give kudos for the technicality of it all. I thoroughly enjoyed it and for every moment I oohed and aahed, I gave side-eye to something said and done (cliche/universal/typical…but not overtly so) and then I cried my arse off on a couple scenes. It’s a solid feature and deserves the mentions its getting. I saw it in 3D without IMAX but I hear that experience makes it even better. Meh, I can do without ALL the sparklies. It was solid, good, but not falling out of my seat great, so great that I have to see it again and again! But that has more to do with me and my preference (not) for ‘fantasy’ features (I deem this more fantasy than sci-fi). I won’t watch it again…shyt was almost 3 hours long! And again, just not a fantasy person but it was worth the price of admission: $5.75.